Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Break- Ups

Happy snowy Tuesday Lovies,
This post is dedicated to the friends and family, that I have spoken too that are going through some tough times with their partners, and ladies I strongly believe that we have been there a few times in our lives (I know I have), we get stuck in the wrong relationships and at times we can get passed them so we choose to suffer instead. Well there have been times that I have had to make some tough decisions in my life as to moving forward with a relationship or terminating. as much as people may say "it will be okay" it is easier said then done, I know this for sure. All in all I hope things can work out and if there are chances and opportunity to fix your relationship then do so. Below are some do’s and don’ts of calling it quits theat I came across…
There is a right way and wrong : No one said ending a relationship was easy. But unless you fell in love with your high school sweetheart and are living happily ever after, every woman needs to do it at some point in her life. And even though it sucks to see your man upset, it’s just not right to take the easy route. That means, no, you can’t deliver a well thought out posting on his Facebook “wall.”

Do break up in person: Address your partner face-to-face so he can have a clear understanding of why you want out of the relationship. You guys probably spent plenty of face-time in the getting-to-know-each other phase. It’s only right that you give him the same respect in the I-don’t-want-to-know-you-anymore phase, too. If for some reason you can’t have a face-to-face conversation (and with Skype, you’re running out of reasons), then break up with him over the phone.
Don't break up via text-message or e-mail:That’s just sending bad relationship karma out into the universe. It’s hard to resolve issues via text message and the brother may have a few questions once he checks his BBM. Plus you run the risk of confusing him as feelings are often very hard to relate electronically.
Do Break-up in private:
You’re already putting your partner in a vulnerable position by telling him it’s over. Breaking up in a private place can allow him to feel those vulnerabilities without shutting off due to embarrassment. Stay away from public places.
Don't change your Facebook status until it's been: The number of people we know who actually found out that their relationship was over via a Facebook status change is growing. This is a more childish and passive-aggressive approach than sending a text message. And it’s a sure-fire way for your boyfriend to find out it’s over from somebody other than you. Eew. How would you like it if one of your friends posted the following on your wall: “Hey girl. I saw that Jermaine changed his relationship status to single. What happened? Are you OK?” Note to self please FB is for fun not to let everyone know what you are going through so please somethings are better kept private.
Do be honest and direct: Now is the time to get your feelings of frustration off your chest, if you need to. Once you’re broken up, it’s not cool to contact your ex and keep bringing up the annoying things he used to do or the awful way he used to treat you. So get it all out, but don’t drag it out. Tell him how you feel, why you feel that way and make it clear that you want out.
Don't lie to him: Lying includes avoiding the truth, ladies. Don’t beat around the bush on why you want to call it quits. He deserves to know exactly why you’re unhappy. Plus, you may help him change a behavioral pattern down the line. Furthermore, if you’ve done something wrong it’s time to let him know so he doesn’t walk around blaming himself for the breakup months after it’s
Do break-up before you stray: Avoid jumping from one relationship to the next and avoid the guilt and drama that comes along with cheating by recognizing when it’s time to let go and then actually letting go. It’s also a good idea to give yourself some space before you move on to the next.
Don't drag it out: If you have fallen in love with someone else while involved in a relationship, the sooner you let your partner go the better. Like we said before, don’t lie. Bite the bullet and tell him that you’re leaving him for another. You’ll feel a lot less guilty if you’re honest with him. Chances are he already sensed some form of separation from you anyway.
Do hear him out: Your ex may have some things to say after you tell him it’s over. It’s not too much to listen to his argument before walking out of the door. Give him the floor and let him explain his.
Don't start a fight: If your man starts to raise his voice, walk away and let him know that you’re willing to continue the conversation when he stops yelling. If you feel firm in your decision to leave, you shouldn't’t feel any need to start an argument.

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