Sunday, October 23, 2011

Dating and Friendship

Very often, people wonder when do you know if your friendship has moved to the next step i.e. dating? Aside from intimacy, what is the difference between dating someone and being close friends with them?

There are many subtle differences between dating someone and being close friends, although many times being close friends with someone can lead to dating. For instance, the title. You can have many close friends but (usually) only one boyfriend or girlfriend. It adds an extra bit of intimacy, you two often know things about each other that you've never told your friends. Plus they physical relationship is totally different, and I'm not just talking about sex. The touch barrier is completely different between best pals and a boyfriend. I generally sit a few more inches apart from my friends than I would from a boyfriend. And I find we touch way more, in ways so slight and subtle, it's like they never happened, but those are exchanges that don't happen between two friends. There is a connection between two people that are dating that nothing else can compare. I'm not saying you can't have the best, deepest, happiest connection with your friends, because I have great friends, who I love. A boyfriend - girlfriend connection breaks to a whole new level however, because, you aren't attracted to your friends in that way. You love them, but you do not want to kiss them like you would a boyfriend, right? When you dream about someone who do dream about Is it your best friend or your crush?

Here are a few signs you are dating vs friendship.

1) Your friends start making very obvious comments. All of a sudden every time you go out with a group of friends (and you and your guy pal are there) comments slip out about how cute the two of you would look as a couple, how into each other you two are, and how compatible your personalities are. Often your friends may see the romance spark before you do!

2) You find yourself making or receiving a daily call, often right before bedtime. Out of nowhere, before you even noticed, the two of you started talking every day, at length, about nothing, and you're secretly loving it. What did you have for was your day...what are you doing right now. You begin to look forward to these conversations with your guy "friend" and a day that goes by without a casual chat just doesn't seem right.

3) Unplanned, you find you have developed pet names for each other. It used to be a "Hey, Bro" kind of thing. Now, it's "Sweetie this" and "hey Babe" that. His texts now include the added "Sweetheart" and "Doll." You don't point it out and make things awkward. You just let your heart melt and start answering to this new litany of adorable terms or pet names.

4) Pats on the back become arm and hand intertwining. Whether it's watching the game on the big-screen TV or playing catch in the park what used to be high-fiving and patting on the back friend-style becomes a softer, gentler hand-holding, draping arms on shoulders, sitting on laps, and hugging kind-of thing which leads, inevitably, to that first little sweeter-than-Hershey's kiss on the forehead. When all these signs are there it's bound to happen.

Fabulous Fashion Mother Always In Heels.

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